Did you Miss Me? Just kidding. I know you Didn't

Well, the past week or so has been tremendously busy, for me anyhow.  Let's see, my little brother got married, I got to be the best man, I met some really cool people, tossed a bachelor party where we only almost all got arrested, I danced myself into oblivion, I tried really hard to behave myself at a rehearsal dinner and wedding reception, which if you know me is quite a feat and borderline impossible, and I managed all this while the brats were sick.  

Poor Mama Bear to deal with them all alone.

But, it's all over with now, and we're back to the swing of things, and, man, am I glad for it!  

There is only so much excitement that a guy can take, and I am not used to spending so much time away from my hooligans, so I am wicked relieved to have them all to myself today whether they are sick or not.

In fact, I kind of like that they aren't feeling all that well because that meant I got to snuggle both of them on the couch all morning with none of the usual fuss and stuff. They just laid on my chest snoring away, occasionally snotting all over me.

*Yuck Face*

But, that is ok.  At least I had some snuggle time.  

Then, when the Pizzmeister woke up finally around 10:30 he looked at me and the first thing he said was "Don't touch me Daddy!"  I guess the fact that he was technically the one touching me since he was draped over my chest slipped by him.  But, that is beside the point, which was that once the Pizzmeister woke up my happy two boy snuggle time was over. 

"Well, I always have Two-zy to snuggle", I thought "He won't push me away for at least another month or so."

Wrong!

He woke up shortly there after, looked at me funny,  let out a scream of rage complete with a Bruce Lee style dragon fist, and then I heard a splat, like somebody dropped a warm sponge on a hard floor.  Not long after that my lap felt oddly warm...and moist.

Yep, you guessed it.

Two-zy was so angry waking up on my lap that he pooed to punish me.  Then he kicked and screamed the whole time I was cleaning him and me up because he somehow magically got poo to shoot out of the diaper and out two leg holes and a neck hole in his pj's.

So gross!

What's worse though is that holding the little squirt while cleaning him up was a lot like "wrassling" a greased up piglet, which, sad as it is to admit, I do, in fact, know what that feels like. 

Why?  

Well, all I'll say is that while growing up my family didn't really have family reunions.  We had Tattoo parties complete with not entirely appropriate games.

Anyway, despite the massive poopsplosion and the fact that neither of the boys seem to happy to see me, I am glad to see them, and I am happy I have them all to myself today.  

It's nice to be back to "normal."