Friday, February 28, 2014

Facing Reality! Hello Old Frenemy!

Well, it's been a great week and few months, except for one minor set back.  We've had a great time playing with all of our toys, we've made some fun little videos, we've gotten some really nice comments and messages from people across my youtube, facebook, and forum worlds, and I am still losing weight!

Overall, I couldn't be happier, and I am extremely grateful for everything.  

I'm lucky!

I know this, despite the one little downfall I'm facing, and finally admitting to myself that I'm facing because I am not sure I can hide it anymore.

My old friend and enemy, I believe the cool kids use the term "frenemy" is out of retirement!

That dirty bastard!

And, here I was, honestly believing that my goal of running a mile by the end of the year was going to happen.

Well, that goal is still set, just may be postponed.  Who knows?

At least, I know that Mr. Cane can retire, or at least take a vacation now and then. That's a plus, right?

Of course it is!  

So, I'm not all that upset by his reappearance today.

I also knew it was coming.  I have been feeling steadily worse off for about a week and a half or two weeks.  I just didn't want to admit it, but, now that I can't hide it any longer I might as well face it.

With any luck, I won't have to use the bastard everyday.  

At least, I don't have to brush a lot of dust off the ferker.

Here's to keeping your fingers crossed!!

Thursday, February 20, 2014

Wednesday, February 19, 2014

I Need a Mulligan!

You know, I have spent a lot of time wishing to drink my morning coffee in a little peace and quiet, and this morning, when I finally got what I wished for, I realized that I don't like it quiet in the house, and I really actually enjoy it when there are brats tugging on my pant legs non-stop.

I miss it when they aren't constantly screaming and laughing and chattering and playing and jumping on me.

It was so weird this morning when they both decided that they wanted me to leave them alone so they could play by themselves in the play room.  It made me sad, and I felt so left out.

Yes, I know, I am supposed to feel proud that they are so independent.   

I know, I'm supposed to be grateful that that they are so confident.

But, I suddenly feel so insecure.  I'm really going to miss having them all to myself everyday when they go to school, and that day is quickly approaching.  

The Pizzmeister is 4 years old already, and Two-zy is going to be 2 in July!    

What happened?

Where did all that time go?!

I need a mulligan!  I feel like I could do it better; spend it a little wiser.

But, life is no game is it? 

I better get my act together. 

The Pizzmeister is starting Pre-Kindergarten in the fall.  I need to prepare, not just him but me too.  Thankfully, I have Two-zy to give me strength!

It's funny!  

Before I had kids, I had this notion that I would be the one giving them strength.  In reality, it's the over way around.

Monday, February 3, 2014

CH...Ch...Ch...Changes! (Soon, I'll be lame)

Yikes!

There are big changes coming down the pike, and I am not sure I really want to admit it yet. 

The Pizzmeister is turning 4 in a week and a half, we are shopping for pre-k's, Mama Bear has her own rc truck now and is cooler than I am, and I don't know how to handle any of this!  

I mean, my big boy is turning four!  

Holy shit!  

How did that happen?!  I swear we just celebrated him turning 2 last week, and now he's turning four and getting ready to start pre-k?!

What the hell, man?

That can't be right!

But, it is.  That inconsiderate little brat is growing up and needs me less and less every day, which is problematic.  I want him to be independent and self-sufficient and all that,  and I am incredibly proud of the little pisser, but I like being the go to guy when he needs snuggles during the day, and Mama bear is at work.  I like being the guy he loves to play with the most. I like being cool and needed!

Soon, he will have all these little bastard friends that will steal my glory.  I'll no longer be "cool dad."  I will be "lame dad," and I am not ready for that transition!

I thought I put a safeguard in place to prolong the arrival of that eventuality with the RC stuff, but that seems to be collapsing around me too now that Mama Bear has her own truck.  I was told point blank this morning that Mama Bear was way more fun than I am now that she'll play with the RC's too.

Ouch!

At least, I can extend my role as the cool fix it guy when the boys break their toys, right?  

Well, I can for awhile anyway.

As I learn new things, I like to teach the boys too, but the problem with that is now the Pizzmeister is starting to practice what I have been teaching him.  

I've been tying my own noose all along, and I am just now realizing it. 

Luckily, I have a while before I'm swinging from the gallows. 

There's a lot left to learn and teach the boys, and, thankfully, Two-zy is still a little dobber, but I know it won't be too long until I am writing about him growing up and needing me less too.

It's something to look forward to and dread.