Tuesday, January 29, 2013

The Pizzmeister is Going to be 3!

Oh man!  February is going to be a big month!

The Pizzmeister is turning three on valentines day! 

So exciting, and so bitter sweet.  He's getting so big and independent that I am constantly amazed by him.  

And, here's a big announcement.

The Pizzmeister hasn't had an accident or used a diaper in over a week, which is a major cause for celebration!

So, this year we are going to do something wicked special for his birthday because we are just so damned proud of him.

As many of you already know, our little Pizzmeister is a major rc and model train nut.  I mean we have radio controlled helicopters and cars and little electric trains just littering our home, so Mama Bear and I thought adding a few more on his birthday would be perfect.

Aah, but there is a twist!  

We managed to find mini rc monster trucks that are roughly on the same scale as his thomas trains and other electric sets.  How cool is that?

So, also for his birthday we are going to construct a mini mountain  for his trains to tunnel through while his new mini monster truck is climbing over it.

This will be awesome, and I really hope he loves it.

Anyway, I have some designing and materials research to do.  Any suggestions would be welcomed gratefully.  :-)

Thursday, January 24, 2013

JaDD Parenting Tip: Be Prepared Your Monsters Are Trying to Throw Your Game

 You know, I like to pretend that most of my parenting moments sort of resemble this picture.  

Look at us.  We're all smiley and happy and shiz; a regular, happy-go-lucky bunch we are.

Well, don't let appearances and my astounding optimism fool you.

This ain't Leave it to Beaver, and we aren't the Cleavers over here!

There are plenty of moments that look like this; two crazy wide awake kids and me missing my big john filled with coffee.

Sure, everybody tells you that kids wear you out, but nobody bothers to tell you that the little brats do it on purpose so you'll make bad decisions.

"Like what?" you ask.

How about like letting them eat Ginger bread houses for breakfast just to quieten them down for a few precious moments?

At the time, this seemed like a brilliant idea.  He ate a crap load and started getting sleepy, and I thought that he was going to fall asleep for sure.


He got goofy instead and ended up running around the house giggling and screaming, which, of course, got Two-zy screaming and giggling because, apparently, Pizzly was hilarious to everyone but me, who only wanted a little quiet time.

Then I got a brilliant idea!

"I know just what I'll do!" I thought. "I'll show the Pizzmeister how to use the laptop to watch his favorite youtube videos."

Yeah, nothing could possibly go wrong there.  It's a positively great idea to show a not quite 3 year old how to access the internet and get on youtube.

Imagine my chagrin when while in the kitchen preparing a bottle for Two-zy, I hear, to my amazement, screaming and cussing that wasn't coming from my kids. 

Not that they know how to swear per se, but they might have picked a few words up here and there.

Anyway, the boy somehow managed to get onto some stupid, teeny boppers fighting video.  Not cool!  

"How did you manage to get here?"  I asked him. "You were on the RC Adventures channel!"

His reply was classic.  

"Shush Daddy!  I'm watching mine stories!"

And, of course, Two-zy thought this all was just the greatest!

So, the lesson here is beware of your kids.  They'll turn whatever you do for them, teach them, or allow them to do against you.  It's just a matter of time, so keep vigilant, and don't let your tiredness or desire for a little peace and quiet throw your parenting game.

Don't get me wrong here.  I'm not saying that parenting is a constant battle with your kids.  It's more like a non-stop fight for your sanity while desperately trying not to be selfish about it.

Thursday, January 17, 2013

'APRISE!!! We Made you a Cake Mommy!

Yesterday, the Pizzmeister was missing Mama Bear a little, and I decided that the best way to cheer him up was to have him do something extra special for her to let her know how much we love and appreciate her.  I mentioned this idea to him and the first words out of his mouth were. 

"CAKE!!! We must to make cake!"

Me- Are you sure she'd like a cake?

Pizzly- I like cake! 

Me- Ok, but do you think Mama would like one?

Pizzly- Of course!

So, we made a cake, which meant going to the store to get the proper crap we would need to decorate it with.

This is how it turned out.  If you look closely you will find that he even included yellow frosting poopies on it.


I am not sure really...but there are butterflies, birds, and snakes as well.  So, maybe the bird at the butterfly, the snake ate the bird, which ate the butterfly, and the poop was the result of such activity?

Anyway, here are a few photos of the cake making process.

Don't mind the mess.  It is what it is...I am a lazy house keeper.  Just ask Mama Bear.  She'll tell you.

Greasing up the cake pan, which to Pizzly means Painting
with butter

Almost getting caught on camera licking the butter off of the
cake pan.  Damn this boy is quick!

Getting ready to frost it
Pizzly telling daddy to hurry up

applying the important crunchy critters from cake mate

Pizzly threatening to dump all of them on the cake.  I called
his bluff.  Unfortunately, he wasn't bluffing/

Two-zy telling me, "He ain't bluffing dad!"
Yep, he did it.

Might as well add sprinkles too at this point.  After all,
what's a little more sugar right?

Threatening to dump the whole bottle again.  This time
I took him seriously.  

Well, there you have it; the Pizzmeister's very first cake making and decorating.

I am sure that there will be many more because around here, if you love somebody and want to show them that you care, you bake them a cake.

We love you Mama Bear!

Wednesday, January 9, 2013

Ch Ch Ch Ch Changes!

Well, here we are.  Back to the beginning of yet another new year.

We've maybe evaded something ominous sounding called the fiscal cliff.  Most of us survived the end of the 13th Baktun, which is a 400 year calender the Maya use that a lot of people assumed was a prediction of the end of the world.  It wasn't.  It was just the end of one calender cycle and the beginning of another. And, the debates over equal rights and gun control are still going strong here in the USA.

Somehow, it feels less like the beginning of a new era and more like a "same ole' shit different day" type of thing.  That's ok.  In a way it's comforting, like hugging a rock.  At least you know what you are going to get.

No surprises, unlike what you get from bratty kids.

Mine seem to be always changing and surprising me.  It's rather pleasant, yet disconcerting simultaneously.  I mean I am thrilled that the boys are growing and developing all these new skills and are needing me less and less, but I am bummed out that they are getting so big and independent. 

I almost cried this morning when The Pizzmeister summarily told me, "No daddy!  Don't need you.  I can do it by mine self!" when I asked him if he needed me to help him remove his pants so he could go potty.

I was so darn proud...and apprehensive.  My little boy is growing up! Yay!


Quick stifle him! 

Then, to top it all off, Two-zy decided to take his swim crawling to the next level this morning, and I swear to whatever deity you believe in that I said, "Oh don't you dare you little puke!  Daddy needs you to stay little!"  Then I ran over and picked him up so I could deny that the crawling thing ever happened.

Now, I am hoping that when I put him down because I feel guilty for screwing up his new "thing" he won't remember how to do it again for at least a few more days.  

Yes, I know I am being selfish and should be overjoyed and excited and I am, but I'm also irrationally a little depressed and pouty.

Damn kids!

Why you gotta grow up so fast?!

Pretty soon you boys will be obnoxious teenager types who hate me, and I'll be counting the days until I can pack you off to college.

But, until then I'm going to feel sad and get all teary eyed when I think of you guys growing up even if that means sex might eventually happen again.