Thursday, December 5, 2013

Spoil them Rotten Parent vs Practical Parent

I've found that there are two key players inside of every parent, one of which is the "Spoil the Kids Rotten Parent" who wants your brats to have all the shit in the world, and then feels bad when you can't give it to them.  This is especially true during the holiday season.

The other important player inside us parent types, is the "Practical Parent" who is...well...practical.  

The practical parent will tell herself/himself, "No!  They don't need this shit.  Teach them to be resourceful and re-purpose the crap they already have," whenever "Spoil the kids rotten parent" wants to spontaneously drop another $20 on whatever toy or gadget or thing they think the kids will like.

Lately, these two parent parts have been warring inside me. Hard. 

Luckily, I think "Practical Dad" is going to win out.

Here's the situation:

Both boys love helping me out in the kitchen.  They help me do everything from baking to meat tenderizing, if I am not paying close enough attention.  

In fact, the only thing they don't help with is clean up.  

Big Surprise there right?

Anyway, their favorite kitchen activity is baking, so I thought I'd get some cute little baking tools for them.  You know, real utensils for little hands.  Something they could actually use.

So, the "Spoil your little shits Rotten Dad" part of me started searching on Amazon for kids kitchen tools and baking sets and what not, and, instantly I was going crazy picking out stuff to make up the perfect kitchen helpers set.

I found some really cute rolling pins by eco kids.  I thought, "For sure the boys would love these!  It even says they are perfect for little hands.  That is definitely going into the shopping cart.  I guess I'd better get two of them, huh? Ok.  Two it is!"


I was on a roll!  This was going to be great because now the boys could have there very own crap to help out when we make pies, cookies, bread, tortillas, pizza, or whatever.  

Super exciting right?!

Then, I wondered what else I could grab for them.

So, I continued on my search and found a totally awesome child's cooking set made by Curious Chef!
So super cool, right?!

Now, I am getting really excited! 

So, I looked up little aprons for kiddies and tiny, little oven mitts and cute, little baking sheets and on and on and on I went.

Before too long, I had $200 bucks of tiny tyke baking crap in my cart.  Here's the worst part...


"Seems about right." I said to myself. "Nothing's too good for my boys.  Besides, they'll use this stuff for years!"

Then, as I was pulling out the good ole' credit card, wise, no-fun, "Practical Dad" screamed at me.

"Oh Hell No!!!" he said. "You mean to tell me that you're going to buy those brats better crap than what you use to cook with?  I don't think so, asshat!  Look at that dowel rod thing they call a rolling pin!  You can go to the hardware store and get yourself a dowel rod, cut it to whichever length you want, sand it and oil it, and presto! Rolling pin for a dollar or less!  Or, better yet let them use what you use! And, no way in hell you're letting a child, not even four yet, handle anything that comes out of the oven!  Forget those oven mitts, idiot!"

So, after thoroughly scolding myself, the "Spoil Them Rotten Dad" part of me pouted and emptied the shopping cart.  "Practical Dad" was right.  The boys don't need all this fancy schmancy stuff.  

There is no reason they can't use what I use.  

After all, if it is good enough for me, then it is good enough for them right?

And, besides, sure it's great to have all the tools in the kitchen made for specific purposes, but, in the real world, that shiz is expensive, so you better learn to improvise!

They'll thank me in the long run...maybe.

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