Thursday, July 26, 2012

Am I a Deviant?

You know, I try my best to be a helpful partner to Mama Bear.  I am by no means perfect or even all that good at it, but I try.

I mean, I do a large portion of the cooking, I try to pick up after myself, I don't run away from dirty diapers, I do my best, which isn't all that great, to keep the house tidy and orderly, and I know this isn't nearly enough, but I'm trying.

That has to count for something right?

Sure, some days I do better than others, and there are days where I feel pretty proud of myself for being a good daddy and husband.

But...then there are days, like today, where I feel like a deviant.

Why?

Because I caught myself fantasizing about my wife grilling!

I won't lie about it, and I am not ashamed of it either. 

I just think it would be super hot if Mama Bear used the grill a few times.

Don't get me wrong.  It's not like watching her grill would be sexy  to me or anything...Well, it might be...Who am I kidding of course it would be.  She's a raging hottie!

But, more importantly, I think it would be awesome if I didn't have to stand outside all by my lonesome while her and the boys are inside playing games or watching movies or something.

I just think it would be wicked cool to be the one inside once or twice because it is kind of a pain walking in and out with the food and utensils and stuff.

It's not like I don't enjoy doing it.  I really do.  I like to cook whether it be inside or out.  I just like having the boys all to myself once in awhile more.  That may change once she goes back to work, but right now I wouldn't mind having them to myself for a bit.

Besides, she might could use a break.

So, I asked her if she wanted to grill, and she said, "I didn't realize I was allowed to."

This instantly made me feel bad.  

Of course she is allowed to use the barbecue!  I am not that freakish...am I?

Then she said, "Well, most guys don't like their wives to cook out because it would be like taking their manliness away."

Well, I am not like most men I guess.  The only thing that I need in order to feel like a man is a mirror.  

The hairiness gives it away!

But, now she's got me thinking.

Am I somehow less of a man because I don't mind if my wife uses the barbecue?

Am I some sort of depraved deviant because I actually want her to use it?
  




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