Thursday, March 8, 2012

Responding to Some E-mails

Since I started doing this blog thing I have received a few e-mails, negative ones; the only type I get it seems.  Now, I am not sure if these messages are from trolls trying to get me riled up or not, but I strongly suspect that to be the case  because nobody can be as asinine as my "trolls" in real life.

But, what internet troll takes the time to look up someone's e-mail address to send them negative e-mails? Wouldn't they just leave their comments on the page?

So, now I am having second thoughts.  Maybe there are people out there that believe what they write to me in e-mail.

This makes me I feel bad because I've yet to respond to the bad e-mails.  That isn't nice of me!

How to make up for this slight?

...I know.  I'll post w bit of some of them here and respond to them for every one to see.  Of course, I'll edit the longer rantier ones and I won't give out names or addresses, but I am sure that if these people are still reading my blog they will know who they are.

E-mailer: How dare you give your child a name like "Pizzly!"  What were you thinking?! Do you KNOW what it is even? I can't stand you people that give there kids "unique" names.

Me: Whoa! Hold on there Little Miss Contrary.  Although I am glad that you feel like you have to step in and bully me about our name choice for the little man, but before your knickers get too knotted up I have to tell you that Pizzly is just his nickname.  He got it because he's a hairy little mite, and, yes, I do know what a pizzly bear is.  It's a mix of a polar bear and a grizzly bear. 


E-mailer: I feel so bad for you little boy.  You sound like an appalling man that doesn't love his kids.  You have no business being a father!  You don't even know your little boy's name.  You just refer to him as "The Boy" all the time....(This was a longer rant that went into me being a bad christian, which I am I guess because I'm not a christian.  Oh...and I am everything that's wrong with modern society too.)

Me:  Wow!  Really?!  Everything that's wrong with society?

 I actually don't know how to respond to this.  I can't stop giggling!  This has to be from a troll. No one is this crazy.

E-mailer:  don't you know how dangerous it is to co-sleep?  Are you actually trying to kill your baby? (I edited this one because she had some information about co-sleeping causing SIDS that was probably from the 80's, and I deleted this one about 3 months ago so I can't recall the exact wording.)

Me:  Yeah, co-sleeping is soooooooooo dangerous!  It is just a matter of time before I roll over and crush my TODDLER in my sleep.  Or do you mean that it is dangerous for the parents?  That I agree with.  I can't tell you how many morning I have woken up with a foot in my eye, throat, stomach, or with a baby draped across my face ironically smothering me.

Here comes my all time favorite e-mail.  It was originally a 1000 plus word rant that I won't make you sit through and read.  Here's the gist.

E-mailer: Mr. Dizzy "Dad,"

I have read a few of your blog entries and I have to tell you that I am very disappointed.  Why do you insist on demeaning all of the work that we as stay at home moms do?

You make being a stay at home parent sound like it is all fun and games and not work, and I find that frankly to be insulting to us women who have stayed at home with our children for years.  We have fought and continue to fight for recognition and the acknowledgement that we deserve, and we don't need  you, a stay at home father, telling everyone how easy it is to be a stay at home parent, which simply isn't true....(the rest either was a repeat of what she already said or her telling me to think about how I could help the cause rather than hurt it. For instance, I could complain about how hard it is more, I could repeatedly say that this is the hardest job I ever had, or I could say that I couldn't hack it as a real stay at home parent and just wait for mama to come home so she can do everything.  Then she signs as...)

A mother of 6 who home schools that seriously hopes you will reconsider,

(Crazy lady)

Me:  What do you hope I will reconsider?  What I write?  Enjoying my time as a stay at home dad with my kids?  What exactly should I reconsider? And, I don't ever recall saying that being a stay at home dad was easy.

As for insulting stay at home moms.  I apologize if that is true.  I didn't realize that writing about my time as a dad who watches his child could possibly be construed as an insult to stay at home moms.  If I make it sound easy it is because it kind of is for me.  

Yeah, the house is always trashed, and there are always toys scattered about, and, no, I can never keep up with the house chores, but that doesn't really matter.  What matters to me more than having a clean house is the fact that I get to spend time with my child during his most formative years.

So, in that respect, being a stay at home dad is easy.  What's easier or more enjoyable than spending time with your kids?  The house being cluttered is small potatoes.  Who cares?  I am not going to ignore my kid over it, especially when I am not 100% positive that I will always be able to play with him the way I want to.

Again, I apologize if I write things that insult stay at home moms.  I certainly never intended for anything I say to be thought of like that.  

Though, with that said, I am never going to say that being a stay at homer is tedious or a chore, and it certainly isn't a job to me.  That doesn't mean that the work a stay at home parent does has no value.  Au contraire.  It has more merit and value to me than any form of employment ever has.  This is my kid I am talking about of course what I do with him has value.  It just isn't a job or tedious to me, and I would never say such a thing.  I find those implications insulting.  I chose to have my family.  I chose to be a daddy, and I refuse to think of raising my kids as a job because I'm a parent not an employee.

A father of one with one on the way who vows that no matter what, his children will never be a chore to him, 

Just a Dizzy Dad


  1. Way to go, Dizzy Dad!
    Anyone who has the time to complain that you are insulting to women and moms is obviously belligerent about their own life choices or worse unable to actually comprehend what you have written. Sadly, some mothers feel that the simply existence of fathers that care about or are active in their children lives diminishes the value of “moms.” We luckily no longer live in a world where, for most people anyway, having two loving parents is somehow not to our children’s advantage. Maybe some of your readers need to spend less time online looking for other people to complain about. Also the obvious nasty response to such readers is “if you work so damn hard as a stay-at-home mom, however did you find time to draft a nasty email to me?”

    Keep doing just what you are doing and forget people like that.

  2. Whether you are a working parent or a homer, raising a child is always a challenge. As a child grows up, you are always second guessing your decisions, wondering if you could have done something differently, and if, God forbid, you've managed to scar your kid for life. Of course, there are always people who will try to determine those things for you. However, you are absolutely right when you say that deciding to spend as much time with your toddler as possible was a very easy decision to make. That is one thing you need never second guess. And I like the nick name, Pizzly.