Wednesday, August 17, 2011

It's A-Maize-Ing!

Yeah, I know.  What a lame title!  So corny!  :)

Well, it's that time of year again.  No, I am not talking about back to school or football season.  I am referring to something a little more ominous than that.  

The season I dread most of all....fresh corn season!

Don't get me wrong here.  I really do like corn as much as the next guy, but when it comes still on the cob I can only take so much of it.  I love it the first few times I have it in autumn, but any more than that and I get sick of it real quick.

Yeah, yeah.  I'm un-American and all that rot.


Why is it that I get sick of fresh corn?

Because it is such a pain in the arse that's why!  

Well...not literally a pain in the arse, but you know what I mean.  

Every ear has to be shucked and cleaned and then you have to either grill it (my favorite) or boil it or something.  It's just too much fuss for me.  

You know, it'd be different if the boy was old enough to do it by himself, but he insists on being too young.  He used the same excuse when he didn't want to shovel the driveway last winter and whenever I ask him to change the oil in the truckster.  

"Daddy!  I'm only 18 months old!  I'm too little to change the oil in the van or to shovel the snow off the driveway!" he says. 

Yeah, yeah likely story.  If you ask me I think that he is just being lazy!

It's funny that he's not too young to trash the place!

The little freeloader!

Anyway, back to my dislike of corn season.  You know, I wouldn't mind corn on the cob if it wasn't for all those nasty little silks that insist on getting everywhere.  I also don't like that I have to employ a dremel tool to get all the pieces from between my teeth every time I eat it.

But, the worst part of getting fresh corn is the fact that I can't seem to ever moderate the quantity in which I acquire it.  I either buy it in bulk or I get an insane quantity of it.  

There is no one or two ears per person.  With me there has to be at least 6-7 ears for each person or none at all.  It's no wonder I get sick of it.

Last night, I shucked 22 ears of corn and cooked them all for only my wife, myself, and the boy, who's 18 months old and can barely eat half an ear.  

That's insane!

So, what did I do with the rest? 

I made my wife freeze it of course!

Well...I can't say that I made her do anything because she is scarier than me, but I did ask her if she would be nice enough to cut the kernels from the cob and toss them in the zip-lock bags for freezing because by that point I was sick of looking at corn, and she was nice enough to do it.   

What can I say she's awesomer than I am!

After that, all that was left to do was clean up all the yucky yucky mess.

What a bummer!
Notice how he isn't complaining about being too young.
That's because he actually likes to sweep!
What a weirdo!

Luckily, I had a super cool helper!

The only problem with the little helper man is that he likes sweeping up the silks so much he'll never stop sweeping.  

Once he makes a pile he'll immediately spread it out just so he can sweep it up again.

And, before you know it he's spreading the silks all over the house and sweeping it up and then spreading it further and then sweeping it up...As you can guess this quickly gets out of hand and leads to a living room full of corn silks.

But, that's cool!  I love watching him sweep.  It's so darn cute!

P.s.  Apparently I never learned my seasons because my wife informed that it isn't autumn yet. I guess it is still mid summer or something.  Oh well.  Whatever season it is corn on the cob is dreadful.

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