Thursday, June 16, 2011

Utter Insanity!

Just a Dizzy Dad
If you saw this face at a public park that was crawling with kids would you be concerned?

Yeah, maybe.  I can see that because I'm even a little leery of any guys that are alone at the park when a bunch of kids are there.  So, I can totally understand it if you would be a little wary of my presence at the park.

Now, here's another question for you.

Dizzy Dad with Little Man.
Who's the sidekick here?
Would you be concerned if you saw me with my toddler at the park playing together like the maniacs we are?

Probably not.  You'd most likely think it was just some guy playing with his son.

And you'd be right because that's exactly what we are. But, apparently, some teacher thought that we, more specifically me, looked suspicious at the park today as the little man and I played.

Here, I'll tell you the whole story or close to it of what I'm on about.

Since today was such a beautiful day, I decided that my little guy and I should go and spend some time at the park.  Unfortunately, when we got there it was mobbed with kids who were there on a field trip or something.

"No Big Deal!" I thought.  "It is a public park after all."

So, with out a thought, the little guy and I started playing and mostly ignoring all the other little bastard kids that were there and being totally obnoxious. 

There's definitely something about a mob of kids that just rubs me the wrong way.

Anyway, after the little guy and I ran around for about an hour and a half he started getting tired so we decided to head back towards the family truckster and go home.

Well, on the way back to the van a police officer pulled up next to us and said, "I received a report of a suspicious male on the premises.  Do you know anything about this?"

Of course, I didn't, so I told the officer, "Nope I haven't seen any other guys here but me today, but that doesn't mean anything because I tend to ignore whatever is going on around me when I am playing with my boy here."

Well, sure enough, some lady came hustling up to us and pointing at me saying "Yes!  Yes!  That's the guy I called about officer!"

She sounded thrilled, like she personally was responsible for nabbing a serial killer or something. 


I was totally dumbfounded!  

I was devestated!

I was really pissed!

I mean who does that lady think she is, Columbo?  If she had any wits about her she would have known that the only reason I was there at all was so that I could play with my son.  

"This is totally outrageous!" I thought.

Luckily, the police officer thought so too.  He was wickedly pissed that she had wasted his time by calling in a false report or whatever he said.  He said a lot of things including something about issuing her a citation for something or other, and something about her being stupid and not having any right to try and remove other children from a public park even if she did have her class there.  

That's when the principal showed up and explained that teachers aren't trained to be observant and a lot of other rot.

Boy, was I pissed!  

What bothered me most of all is that neither the stupid teacher nor the principal bothered to apologize to me.  The closest they came was making excuses like "I am obligated to look out for my kids, and seeing a strange guy at the park is kind of scary."


To this the officer replied, "If you are worried enough about these children that you are going to call the police every time you see a stranger while you're at a public place, then you have no business taking them anywhere."  Then the officer apologized to me for having to go through this. 

How do you like that?  The officer apologized even though he did nothing wrong.  That is like me apologizing for wanting to take my son to the park.  

Don't get me wrong.  I really appreciate the sentiment, but I would have liked to have the stupid teacher and the principal apologize instead.  That clearly wasn't going to happen however.  I guess it would be hard to apologize to someone because you are stupid.  It isn't like they could do anything about their intelligence or anything.

So, the little guy and I left without our well deserved apology, and get this.  The officer walked us to our car and even put my stroller in the back of my van for me.  What an awesome guy!

Well, that was how my afternoon has been spent so far.  Not much fun I tell you.  It kind of makes me wonder if I should shave down my beard and trim my hair.  But, then again "F*** it!" 

I'm not going to change my physical appearance just so I fit in better at the trashy park the little guy and I frequent.  I'm a parent now.  What do I care if I am a total uggo?


  1. I am astounded that you didn't get any kind of apology from the teacher or the principal. My dealings with the City of Cortland police has always been a positive one and I was happy that at least that portion of your encounter today was a good one......jeepers! Aunt Mare

  2. Obviously the teacher and the principal both had their heads so far up there backsides they couldn't see dad and son playing in the park. It's understandable that they "had to look out for their students".... but that's no excuse for rude and thoughtless behavior. At the very least, the teacher should have voiced her concern to the principal who should have introduced herself, expressed the teacher's concern and find out who you were and what you were doing in the park. Then again...since you were there with your own was really none of their business. Of course, a teacher should be concerned about the safety of the kids in her/his class. To automatically assume that a bearded, long-haired man in a park in the middle of the day is a predator is simply outrageous. An apology is definitely in order from the principal AND her subordinate to you as well as the police officer.

  3. Ha! They caught you in the act! a heinous crime: a dad actively parenting! And all thanks the vigilance of one of our “fine” educators!

    And they let that women teach our young and impressionable children. Not a wonder the average reading-level for kids graduating from high school is a 3rd grade reading level! They should fire that woman!

  4. I am SO sorry that happened to you. As a Mom & a Teacher, I am THRILLED when I see strange men at the park playing w/their kids. Even if they have too much facial hair ;-)I honestly wish I saw more of it. If I had my class at the park & saw you playing w/your kid, I'd wave & smile & wink conspiratorially, because we are the lone adults in a mob of kids and well...we HAVE to stick together. Keep you hair. Keep your beard. Keep being the wonderful father that makes time for his kid. And like you said, F**k 'em if they don't like it!!!!!!!