Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Yep, I'm a bit of an Ogre, but I bet You are Too!

So, as I am watching the final episode of Shrek for the 100th time I am starting to see similarities between Shrek and myself.  Not physical similarities of course.  I am a card carrying, certified fatty and he doesn’t seem to be in that bad of shape.  He is also hairless where I am almost cruelly hairy.  My genetics have gone bad, and have played a terrible joke on me making me look like some sort of Sasquatch gorilla cross breed.  It just isn’t right, but I am used to it by now and have come to terms with my unnatural hairiness, and now I wouldn't have it any other way.

No, the similarities between Shrek and myself aren’t physical, but I can still see them and I can totally relate to Shrek and how he reacts to certain things.  Like Shrek, I think it is the greatest thing to wake up to a giggling little runt, I hate children’s birthday parties, I tend to throw tantrums, and I also say things that I don’t mean when I get angry.  But, unlike Shrek, I have never gotten tired of hanging with my baby boy, I have never wished to go back in time to a point when I had no responsibilities, and, most of all, I don’t feel like less of a man now that my life has changed because I am a dad.  But, I know plenty of fathers that would feel like that or do.  I just don’t understand why.  Being a daddy rocks!

Since, when does taking other people into consideration emasculate anyone?  Sure, it’s easier if the only person you have to think about is yourself, but isn’t it a little pathetic too?  I don’t know.  I guess it boils down to the fact that I don’t really know what makes a man manly.  It is a confusing concept to me.  I always thought that just peeing while standing up was enough.  Now, I am not so sure anymore! 

I am relatively certain that being man has nothing to do with being belligerent or forceful or being the quintessential tough guy that we see in the movies.  You know what I am talking about right?  The type of guy who doesn’t take any crap from anybody.  If you don't know what I am talking about go an rent any film that Mark Wahlberg is starring in, or better yet watch something with Clint Eastwood in it.  

Well, I hate to say it, but I think that most of the guys that tend to act like those types of characters are more or less spoiled assholes, and I am not positive, but I don’t think that being a self-centered ass makes anyone more manly.  But, to be fair, I also don’t think being manly is all that important anyway.  After all, I sing show tunes while dancing around with the little man all day.  I have heard that that kind of thing is definitely not manly, but maybe I've gotten bad information.  

Anyway, besides the whole being like an ogre/man thing, I can definitely relate to how Shrek feels, and I am willing to bet that most other people can too.  I guess there is a little bit of an ogre in all of us.  Now, that is something to ponder.



P.s. Yes, I realize that Shrek is a character and not a real ogre because Ogres do not exist.  I just happened to be marveling at how the creators of the Shrek franchise could make their character so life like and multidimensional. 


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